Okay this is bad, my blogviews have drop drastically... sorry for not updating my blog for so long, have been really busy enjoying life and I am still enjoying now (:

The topic death have been revolving around my mind for this few days, after noticing so many funerals around my eststes, looking at newspaper articles of how some famous actor (ah nan) have just passed away, watching the movie The Impossible. All these events or experiences made me realize how vulnerable a human life can be. I mean let's just take a look at all the newspaper articles and posts spreading on fb, it's like someone may be just walking home from school or smth and voom, you can just get langah by a car even before you can scream. What's worst is that some don't even know that they will never wake up the next morning after saying goodnight to their loved ones. Thinking of all these really make me realize how important it is to treasure every single minute as long as I am still breathing.  Well, I may not become someone successful in my life but at least if I were to die now, I would say that I did enjoy my life as Tan Shu Ying. 
That day, melody and I were discussing about death, like how we would want our funeral to be conducted when I am dead and who I would like to "see" at my funeral and how each of my family and friends will react to my death.  And talking about this topic also made me realize another harsh truth about life and human. That is, people somehow will only treasure a person only when that person is dead. Some people who you don't usually see or will never be able to see again will only appear at your funeral. I know this because I have witness my grandma's funeral 6years ago and I saw many unfamiliar faces whom I Was later told that they were my grandma's relatives and friends. It's like....  还健康活着的时候为什么不见面，偏偏就要等到躺在棺材里的时候才来见她最后一面呢？Well, this also makes me wonder who will actually appear in my funeral (choyyy, touchwood ) and who will actually cry when I am gone? If my life is like a computer game character which allow me to revive over and over again, then I swear I will sincerely wanna try out death. My purpose for this is not to make my parents sad or whatsoever, I just want to find out who are the real friends that will genuinely care for me. So that when I am back alive, I know who I should treasure and how to treasure my new life. This two days, I went to ask two of the closest guy In my life (excluding dad and bro ) on how they will react and what will they say to me as their last words if I were to die later. Both of them scolded me for asking such questions, but I explained to them that I just want to know the answer because I just want to make full use of my life and live my life with no regrets, like what I have said earlier, we will never know when god will put a fullstop to our life and that's why many things should be settled and 交代清楚, like in case of emergency.  So the two of them said the same things, and I shouldn't say it here because I don't want you all to get diabetes hehehehe,  but the point is, Yes I am really happy to hear all these words which I don't usually get to hear. And I am glad that I didn't hear them only after I have died. Ok, Anw cny is coming I should stop bringing up the word die haha, seriously all I want to do is enjoy life now and make sure we will live with no regrets. If there's any regrets that I am going to have will only be the fact that I didn't manage to go on to work and repay my parents. So yeapp, think about it... is there anything that you have always want to tell me but didn't dare to? Or is there anybody you wish to meet/talk to but didn't have the guts to? Do it now，the worse feeling that one can ever have is regrets and don't ever let this haunt you even after you have become a ghost.